I know this. You know this.
But parenting during really stressful times, where everything is up in the air and unknown, feels like a whole new level of difficulty.
Between the self-isolation, schools closing, jobs going remote, constant news updates, fear, uncertainty, being at home with the kids 24/7, and SO MUCH HAND WASHING, it has often felt like we can’t catch a break…
And yet, I’m grateful for this time because it has challenged me to become more patient. More present.
To give myself more grace.
To get more creative with how I nurture myself, and my relationship.
And that’s been pretty amazing.
So… How Do We Get Through This?
In the process of finding my new normal (and maintaining my sanity!) during this time, I’ve found a handful of tips that are working for me, and I shared them with Truth Bomb Mom.
I hope they help you too!
1. Keep a Daily Schedule
Shifting my mindset to focus on life hour-by-hour rather than day-by-day or week-by-week has been crucial to getting through the day.
I create a daily schedule that helps me and my kids thrive with a strong routine. This gives me a sense of control and helps me feel more capable… because all I need to do is make it through the next hour. And then the next one. And the next one. It’s a bite-sized approach to each day that gives the family the order we need.
But it’s not just the schedule. It’s getting really clear on what I’m responsible for and what my husband is responsible for. When we’re on the same page, and sharing the motherlode of daily tasks, we avoid bickering and, also, make more time to spend together.
So, long story short: with a daily schedule, our kids do better. We do better. I do better.
Truly a win-win situation for all!
2. LET IT GO
I’ve adopted a LET IT GO attitude.
Yes, I have a strong daily schedule, but so what if it goes a little awry? I have started to give less f*cks.
Because as much as a schedule guides and calms me, getting upset if something goes “wrong” is simply a waste of my energy.
Yes, I want to feed my kids three healthy meals a day, but so what if they have a bowl of cereal for dinner? I’m not a perfect mother, but if they are fed and happy, I’ll consider that a WIN.
Laundry may pile up, the dishes may get stacked, I may fall behind on my deadlines, but, just like Elsa, I LET IT GO. Not EVERYthing can get done EVERY day.
I can’t do it all, because right now it’s a different world. And if I’m honest, even when our world finds it’s new normal, I’m gonna keep this Let It Go attitude with me.
3. Keep Moving
Third, I am working out and dancing up a storm.
There are so many free online workouts available that are fast and fun.
I am jumping on my trampoline.
I am joining live dance parties on IG and trying out dance tutorials.
And I am stretching out for 3-minute intervals throughout the day, just to reset and find my way back into my body.
I do this because I know that it’s IMPOSSIBLE to stay stuck in feelings of sadness or anxiety when you are moving your body.
We can’t control what’s happening in the world, but we can choose to stay moving in an effort to release stuck emotions, process our feelings, and give ourselves a boost of internal energy.
4. Get Silly
I believe we need more laughter and pleasure now, more than ever.
So, I’m tapping into my silly side and playing dress-up with my kids.
Why? Because it’s a creative outlet for me and a good way to blow off some steam. And it’s another way to stay connected to my children and distract them from their own fears about everything going on!
We bring out old halloween costumes and fancy clothes and play with make-up and wigs every few days because…
IT’S REALLY A FUN DISTRACTION.
And the kids love it, and their joy is contagious.
5. Connect With Nature
Spending time in nature as much as possible has been a BIG help in recent months. Getting out of the house (where it’s easy to feel trapped), seeing the birds, trees, flower and even other people from afar is so good for my sanity.
What this looks like in reality is this:
- I take multiple bike rides a day. Whenever I feel my temper start to rise, or a wave of weepiness coming in, I say I need a break and jump on my bike. It is THE BEST “reset button” for me.
- I step outside a lot and take deep breaths as I toggle between work, homeschool, and domestic duties every day.
- I look at my garden and admire all the beautiful details with a childlike wonder.
I am stopping to admire and smell EVERY flower.
I am pausing to notice EVERY butterfly.
I am standing still and watching the clouds change shape.
Bottom line is that nature is having such a healing, calming effect on me right now.
6. Find Pleasure Everywhere
As per usual, I am finding ways to experience pleasure in as many ways as possible throughout the course of my day. And I encourage you to do the same.
Savor the flavors of your food. Take time to really taste every morsel as you eat.
You might bring out perfumes from your cabinet and smell each one, remembering the times, people and places those scents are associated with.
Put on clothes that feel DELICIOUS on your skin.
Listen to your favorite music. Close your eyes and get lost in the beautiful sounds.
Paint when your kids paint, and notice he way the brush glides across the canvas.
Go in for 6-second kisses with your partner, as a daily practice, even if it feels like the most unromantic moment in time, EVER.
And do all this with the knowledge that: Pleasure is the Antidote to Pain.
You always have an option to choose pleasure over pain. To choose sensuality over stress. So why not do it?
7. Choosing Presence With My Kids
I am choosing to be more present than ever with my kids.
Because as crazy as this moment is, it’s also such a beautiful opportunity to get closer than ever with our children.
Truth bomb: I never took any REAL maternity leave from my business after having kids, and I’ve always felt torn between my professional dreams and my deep desire to mother my kids.
I’ve always felt stretched thin between work and motherhood, and felt guilty that I’m not giving enough of myself to either.
But this moment has given me such a clear message to me to SLOW DOWN.
To look at what’s REALLY IMPORTANT.
And to lean MORE DEEPLY in toward the two beautiful little humans who call me mama.
And while I know you’re juggling so, so much, I hope you can do the same.
So, mamas. Thanks for checking in on the blog here.
May the force be with us! May we all stay sane while we’re mothering and working around the clock.
And may we find our new normal soon.
As always, I wanna know what you think and how you’re doing.
What are your tips to stay sane when you’re with your kids all the time?
Let me know in the comments below and let’s stay connected!